I’m going to delete my blog.
In my opinion, I am working too hard for something that no one rewards. It’s stressful. I worry about scaring off followers with personal posts, or not posting enough, or coming off robot-like. That’s not what having a blog should be like. It shouldn’t make my heart lurch to check to see if I’ve lost any followers, it shouldn’t make me want to cry when I post a photo that I spent an hour editing to perfect condition get only 2 notes, I shouldn’t worry so much about a blog, and yet I do. That’s not what having a blog should be like.
When I first came on tumblr, I looked at the accomplished Bowie blogs and decided I wanted to be just like them, what with them being showered with lovely messages, people coming to them with questions about Bowie… I wanted to have a blog like that. I tried, and it obviously did not work. It wasn’t really the praise I was after, but the respect. I wanted to be seen as someone of value. But, through this past year I’ve realized that just won’t, and can’t, happen. I do not belong here, that’s been made perfectly clear.
I am sorry for wasting space on your dashboards.
I am sorry for wasting time posting pictures no one really cares about.
I am sorry for filling tumblr with just another blog of no value.
I am sorry for annoying people in attempt to befriend them.
I am sorry it took me this long to realize no one cares about me or what I have to say.
Fear not, I’ll be deleting my blog soon enough. I’m sure you’ll all be happy to have me from your busy dashboards.
Much love and many Bowies, Claire.